This is the continuation of my much delayed "Lost" recap series. Anyone can do these things on a timely basis. But not everyone can write these weeks later. The suspense is killing you isn't it? Okay, I won't torture you anymore.
This week's episode is all about the "Lost" blonde we love to hate, Juliet.
We open on a closeup of someone playing with one of those lame Zen rock gardens that people buy for their offices. The ads for those things promise to help the stressed office worker "clear the mind of chaos associated with everyday business life."
Turns out the mind being cleared of chaos is Juliet's. The first thing I notice is she's got on makeup and her hair's done. Not done well, but done. She's seated on a sofa in what looks like a doctor's consulting room.
The door opens and Harper Stanhope enters. Harper introduces herself and when she calls Juliet, Dr. Burke, Juliet asks her to call her by her first name. Harper's a therapist and though Juliet says she doesn't need therapy, Harper says, "Let's just call it talking."
Harper starts off the discussion by asking Juliet, since she's been "there" for a week, "What's her least favorite part so far?"
Juliet says she doesn't like being treated like a celebrity. Harper implies that's not surprising since she's "big news right now."
Okay now I'm thinkin', this is it. Juliet's one of the Oceanic Six and this is Oceanic enforced therapy after returning from the island.
Juliet continues that she doesn't like being the center of attention because it makes her feel isolated and lonely.
Then surprisingly, Harper basically says in a blunt and untherapist-like manner, you'll soon realize you're not that special, Blondie.
There's a knock on the door. Harper calls, "Come in," and in walks...Tom!
He's very much alive and delivering a message, "Ben wants to see the Doc."
Ah, these "Lost" writers are such sneaky fakeout artists. Welcome to our first flashback of the season.
Harper gives Juliet permission to leave and then says, "Welcome to the island."
Yeah, welcome indeed.
Tom escorts Juliet through the bustling barracks and tells her if she doesn't watch it, within a week Harper will have her "crying about your Daddy." And he says he's speaking from personal experience. Heh.
They arrive at a charming little barrack's cottage and who's in the front doorway with a bouquet of fresh flowers? None other than Ben at his most charming.
He welcomes Juliet and informs her the charming little cottage is hers. It's got 2 bedrooms, 2 baths, washer, dryer, fresh linens, a well stocked fridge, and all the opera CDs she can listen to.
Yo Ben, does it have a panic room for when you decide to gas everybody in a hundred mile radius?
Juliet, with island stars in her eyes, isn't thinking about such things when she tells Ben he shouldn't have gone to so much trouble considering she's only going to be on the island for six months.
Oh, poor misguided Juliet.
Ben gives her one of those smiles that never quite reaches his eyes and tells her they want her to feel right at home.
And considering she's never leaving there and she'll eventually become his love slave, why shouldn't she be as comfortable as possible?
Flash forward to the island at night. Juliet is trying to fix some poles for a shelter to sleep under. Sun comes over to help and wants to know why Juliet's bothering since they're going to be rescued soon. Right? RIGHT?
Juliet's like, sure, sure, but we still have to sleep somewhere tonight, don't we?
Jack walks up and asks if Juliet knows where Charlotte and Daniel are. All their stuff is gone. Jin says he saw them going into the jungle. Jack gets all agitated and wants to know why Jin didn't say anything. Jin says in halting English, "You said they are friends."
Sun's like, "Aren't they?"
Cut to Jack with the posse of Juliet, Jin and Sun. They have torches and head off in the pouring rain to search for the missing twosome of the Fearless Foursome.
Juliet runs off into the jungle by herself and all of a sudden she starts hearing the island "whispers of death." She whirls around as the whispers get louder and then...Harper appears out of nowhere.
"Hello Juliet. Long time, no see."
Opening credits.
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