5 Things About Paul Ryan No One Else Will Tell You

Everyone's talking and writing about Mitt Romney's VP pick, Wisconsin congressman, Paul Ryan.  But what they won't tell you are a few select tidbits I discovered for myself.

1. Ryan has the prettiest eyes of any Republican ever. They're like a cross between blue and sea foam green.  I mean have you seen them?  They're like something a fairy from another planet would bestow on a human baby, they're that pretty.

2.  Within minutes of Romney's announcement, Paul Ryan's cowlick set up a Twitter account: @PaulRyanCowlick.  One of his best tweets:  

— Paul Ryan's Cowlick (@PaulRyanCowlick) August 11, 2012

Unfortunately he only has 65 followers, but give him time.  Give him time.

3. It's been widely reported Ryan's a gym rat, but what's less well known is that he's a HUGE Zumba junkie, and an expert at the macarena.

4. The reason the Romney campaign used Jerry Goldsmith's theme from the film "Air Force One" for Ryan's introduction is because as a child, Ryan has a cameo in the film.  He's one of those guys on the tarmac looking gobsmacked after the highjackers get the plane back in the air.  His closeup was cut because Harrison Ford insisted no one in the film could have eyes prettier than his.

5. Many people know that Ryan loves fly fishing, but what they may not know is that he learned the skill as a child using sneaker laces and his goldfish named Sam.

As I find out more, I'll be sure to share it.

"The Addams Family" Musical: A Ghoulish Hoot

Courtesy Addams Family Musical

I won’t lie to you, the Broadway musical The Addams Family wasn’t at the top of my list of shows to see.

I was a Munsters fan.

But after seeing the show last week, with its first rate cast and “let’s not take ourselves too seriously” attitude, I have to say, I had a ghoulishly good time.

The show, based on the Charles Addams’ New Yorker cartoons about a “creepy, kooky; mysterious and spooky” family, stars Broadway, film and TV vet Roger Rees as Gomez Addams and Brooke Shields as his ghostly wife, Morticia.

The show kicks off with the opening number, “When You’re an Addams,” and it’s a toe tapping hoot.  It takes place in the Addams’ family cemetery and is the family’s yearly celebration of life and death. 

Especially death.

BlogHers Flashmob to Lady Gaga

Had to miss BlogHer '11 in San Diego this year but got a kick out of watching an official BlogHer flashmob to the dulcet tones of Lady Gaga!

How "The Big Bang Theory" Renewed My Faith in Sitcoms

Photo: Monty Brinton/CBS

These days The Big Bang Theory might be referred to as "one of the other Chuck Lorre shows on CBS that never starred Charlie Sheen." But it's got a lot more going for it than that.

After the cancellation of Seinfeld, I'd pretty much given up on sitcoms.  As far as I was concerned, the genre was tired, overused and creatively spent.  And while I had memories of great classics like The Cosby Show, Roseanne, The Golden Girls and even I Love Lucy to keep me chuckling, I had little tolerance for pale imitations.  

Of course every season I would check out the latest the networks had to offer, but even pretty good shows like Modern Family couldn't get my comedic juices flowing.  So I had to find my laughs in dramedies like Ugly Betty and Desperate Housewives.

Then came The Big Bang Theory. 

"Motherhood is Murder by Diana Orgain:" Fun Summer Reading

Looking for a good book to take to the beach?  Check out Diana Orgain's new mystery, "Motherhood is Murder."

Some of you may remember I met Diana at last year's BlogHer and subsequently did a review of her debut novel, "Bundle of Trouble."

In "Bundle of Trouble," new Mom, Kate Connolly became embroiled in a murder mystery involving her brother-in-law.  Finding she had a knack for detecting and wanting to have a flexible way to make some bucks and not return to the corporate life, Kate decided to try her hand at being a PI.

In Diana's new mystery, "Motherhood is Murder," Kate hooks up with members of a new mother's group, but things go haywire when one of the ladies is murdered.  Though the police are on the case, it's up to Kate to sort through the suspects and find the real killer.

Add to that taking care of a husband, a 7 week old baby, and trying to fit in breast pumps, exercise and keeping track of her mother's boyfriends, Kate's life is hectic but she approaches it with humor and smarts.

"Motherhood is Murder" is light, fun reading, and a cracking good mystery to boot.

You can read an excerpt of "Motherhood is Murder" on Diana's website but better yet, enter my summer book giveaway in a couple of weeks to win your own copy.  Stay tuned for details.

Fun with Lady Gaga "Telephone" Video Spoofs

You've heard the song, you've sung the song, you've marvelled at the weirdness of the video. Now it's time to watch the spoofs. Lady Gaga is now so popular, spoofs of her songs are all over the internet. That includes her latest viral video, "Telephone" -- and it's only appropriate that it features the previous queen of the viral video, Beyonce, whose "Single Ladies" video last year had everyone, young and old, large and small, black and white, hairy and bald, taking a turn on the "Single Ladies" dance floor.  And spawned a slew of "Single Ladies" spoofs.

Now it's Gaga's turn. First, the original.

But have you seen the Afghanistan troop version?It stars some troops in Afghanistan who evidently have secret desires of being back up dancers for Gaga when they come home. It's had more than 3 1/2 million hits.

Betty White Rocks the House on "SNL" (Video)

Well Facebook got its way last night when comedy golden girl Betty White hosted "Saturday Night Live."  Y'all probably know the story, how an enthusiastic Betty White fan, armed with Facebook and a dream, created a movement that convinced SNL producer Lorne Michaels to have her host the show.

After last night you have to ask yourself, what the heck took them so long?  Because even when the material was sup-par, Betty was brilliant.

First check out her perfectly timed monologue and how fabulous she looks at a youthful 88 1/2 years old.  My favorite line when she pokes fun at Facebook:  "In my day we had phone book.  But we wouldn't waste an afternoon on it."

The bad hosts SNL usually trots out are sorely lacking in comedic timing.  Betty White should conduct a master class for all future hosts.  Add to that her sweet smile and the devilish twinkle in her eye as she delivers a cutting or raunchy line, and you can't help but be caught up in the Betty magic.

It's as if she's saying, "Yes, I know I look like a sweet, innocent 88 1/2 grandma who you think never cursed, never had sex and never had a cross word to say about anyone.  Well, think again."

Tina Fey on SNL Introduces The Sarah Palin Network (Video)

If you missed the return of Tina Fey to "Saturday Night Live" last night, you can't miss her as Sarah Palin introducing the new Sarah Palin TV network.

Enjoy!

Hysterical Opening Credits for "Lost" with a Saul Bass Twist

Okay y'all this is the funniest thing I've seen in days!

It's a sample of the opening credits for "Lost" if they had been done by cinematic title designer Saul Bass.  Bass was a graphic designer and responsible for some of the most memorable film titles in history. 

Throughout his career he created over 50 film title sequences for such directors as Alfred Hitchcok, Otto Preminger and Martin Scorsese.

This one for "Lost is guaranteed fall on the floor funny.

My favorite images, the baby bottle for Claire and the dog with the wagging tail for Michael and Walt.

Enjoy!

Lost vs. Saul Bass from Hexagonall on Vimeo.

"Mad Men's" Jon Hamm is Hilarious as Republican Scott Brown on SNL (Video)

Jon Hamm seriously needs to host "Saturday Night Live" more often, 'cause the show is so much funnier when he's on it.

Check out this fabulously funny sketch where top Democrats have bedroom fantasies about the newly elected Republican senator, and former Cosmo pin-up boy, Scott Brown.

Hysterical Ken Burns Documentary, "The Late Night Wars"

This comes from Jimmy Kimmel and ABC. Enjoy!

One Last Look At 2009 Courtesy of JibJab (Video)

This was too funny to pass by.  Enjoy.

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

The Muppets Perform "Bohemian Rhapsody" Hee, hee! (Video)

Need a good laugh?  Well here it is:  the Muppets performing Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody." (Via Boing Boing)

Hy-ste-ri-cal!!!

Enjoy!

 

I Can Has Cheezburger: The Musiclol

I was probably one of the last people on the internet to know what a lolcat was.  See I'm a dog person and if there had been loldogs, I'd have known all about 'em.  But grammatically challenged pussycats?  Not so much.  "I has funnie pitchures and capshuns?  Wut you talkin' bout Kitty?"

Of course I'd seen a couple of funny cat pictures with cutesy sayings and I'd seen the phrase, "I Can Has Cheezburger" but I just thought it was some wise acre blogger poking fun at McDonalds.   It wasn't until I was assigned to go see the "I Can Has Cheezburger, The MusicLOL" at the Cherry Lane Theatre in New York that I truly understood the size,  the scope and the power of the monstrous lolcat phenomenon.

Google Got You Down? Here's A Humorous Solution

Pay close attention because there's lots to laugh about in this one.  Enjoy.

Wanda Sykes On "The Tonight Show" (Video)

Wanda Sykes is on a roll.  She's getting her own Fox Saturday late night talk show this fall and people are still buzzing about comments she made while hosting the recent White House Correspondents dinner. 

Then last night she was a guest on "The Tonight Show" and explained in hilarious detail why comedians and the press have such a hard time with Michelle Obama.



Somehow I don't believe Michelle Obama will ever have those rods taken out of her neck!

Timberlake and Samberg's Special Mother's Day Gift (Video)

Well Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg have done it again on "Saturday Night Live."  Last time it was their beyond popular digital short, "Dick in a Box."   This time it's a special Mother's Day short, "Motherlover." 

The plot?  Let's just say Justin and Andy decide the best gift they can give their mothers is in--ahem, the bedroom.  See if you recognize the two mothers in the film.*   Enjoy.

My favorite line?  "I'm gonna be the syrup, she can be my waffle."

*Susan Sarandon and Patricia Clarkson

Ten More Things I Kinda Love About Sitting In My Backyard

Last fall I did a post, "Ten Things I Kinda Love About Sitting In My Backyard."

Now on this very beautiful Mother's Day, and since I've gotten a couple of glasses of chardonnay in me, I think it's time for the spring version:

Ten more things I kinda love about sitting in my backyard:

1. Admiring the beautiful salmon pink color of the geraniums I planted this afternoon.
2. The brisk breeze that caresses my face when I close my eyes.
3. The freedom I have to walk barefoot in the grass anytime I want.
4. The knowledge that my neighbors are not just neighbors, but wonderful friends.
5. That special, shade of green that only exists during spring.
6. The petals that cascade into my yard from my neighbors' cherry blossom tree like pink snowflakes.
7. The rich smell of fertilizer from my patio planters.
8. The feeling of accomplishment because this yard is mine due to my hard work.
9. The familiarity of being at home.
10. The reminder it gives me that blogs, laptops, BlackBerries and technology, though wonderful, are only a very small part of what life is really about.

Happy Mother's Day!

Megan's 25 Random Things

Remember a few weeks ago when I said how much I hated memes? And especially that dumb Facebook "25 Random Things" meme? Well I lied.

I love memes.  In fact they're my secret obsession.  But that's not all.  Many of the things you think you know about Megan are not quite true.  In fact you may be shocked by the following list.

So, drumroll please...without further ado are Megan's 25 Random Things about herself:

1. My name ain't Megan.  If you've read my "About" page you already know that, but I don't use a pseudonym to protect my privacy.  It's because a blog called Octavia's Minute would sound kinda strange.
2. I'm not black.  I just said that to be different.
3. I hate blogging.  It's just that my real profession in the sex trade doesn't maintain my very lavish lifestyle, so I have to supplement.
4. The same goes for writing for BlogHer.  You think I like it, don't you?  Not even.  And those women over there, what a bunch of catty bitches!
5. The "Damages" finale is tonight and you'd expect that I'd be watching, wouldn't you?  Well no.  I don't watch "Damages."  Those recaps some of y'all are so fond of?  My 10 year old niece Nancy writes 'em. 
6. The same goes for those "Desperate Housewives" snap recaps.  And I gotta crack the whip because she's way behind on all of them, the little slacker.
7. I voted for John McCain.
8. Those surrogate kids of mine?  Don't exist. The only kid in my life is stupid little Nancy and if she doesn't catch up on those recaps, that's gonna change in a big way.
9. You think Megan's favorite TV shows are "Lost," "American Idol," "House," "24" and shows like that, don't you?  Well no.  My favorite show?  "The Osbournes Reloaded."
10. I hate teenagers.
11. I hated teenagers even when I was one.
12. I'm reaching a milestone birthday this year and haven't decided how many people I'm telling the number to.
13. I'm having a birthday party.
14. My favorite song these days, Madonna's "Jump."  I am so ready to jump!  And look out when I do.
15. If my in time at my day job is 9 AM, as long as I get to Penn Station by 9 AM, I consider myself on time.
16. My dog Daisy?  She wasn't a cocker spaniel.  She was a chihuahua.
17. I almost always believe I'm the smartest person in any room.
18. I don't really believe Oprah's a goddess.  I just said that so I'd have a good SEO phrase.
19. I want to have Bill O'Reilly's baby.
20. I use a Twitter ghost writer.
21. My Twitter ghost writer?  You guessed it, Nancy.
22. One of my neighbors is a black belt in judo.
23. One of my other neighbors is a screenwriter.
24. Simon Cowell and I once chatted on the phone.
25. Facebook bought my idea about paying users to write memes.

Tomorrow's meme?  25 reasons you can't believe everything you read on April Fool's Day.

Sometimes Out Of Death Comes Life: Happy Birthday Megan's Minute!

Sometimes out of death comes life. 

A month before I started Megan's Minute, a good friend of mine, I'll call him CR, had a stroke and died.  He was 59 years old.

He was a brilliant, funny, often infuriating man who lived and breathed, photography, film and literature.  He was proudly anti-social, unapologetically liberal and would have been as astounded as anyone to see that a black man was now President of the United States.

CR was also an incredible writer, but when he died, his novel was unpublished and his screenplays unmade.  Only those of us who knew him well knew what a wonderfully entertaining and imaginative writer he was.

The last time I saw CR was months before he died.  My last contact with him was exchanged emails the Christmas before he died saying how we had to get together soon.

After hearing of his death, I was devastated that the "get together" would never happen.  And mixed in with the grief of his loss was the thought that no one else would ever read his work.

Why am I telling you this?

It's simple.  I've always believed myself to be a writer.  I've written stories, screenplays, and portions of novels, but never had the courage or the commitment to jump in feet first and find out if I had what it took to make a living as a writer.

After CR died, I discovered I desperately needed for someone to read my work.  Even if it was only five people whose names I never knew.

I'd already been considering blogging thanks to my friend Island Girl.  And after CR died, that was the push I needed to get me past the fear of my work not being good enough, or perfect enough, or whatever.

I chose Valentine's Day 2007 for my first post because it was a Valentine to myself.  A commitment to myself, my work and what I hoped would be a new future.

So at 11:55PM--it took me until the end of the day to summon my courage--I clicked "post" and  my first Megan's Minute post went live.